by Violet

Maybe I get lonely sometimes, so I wait for you to ask if I want you to stay. I always want you to stay. Maybe I want to kiss you and have you tell me I’m lovely so I can remember how to be that good person again. Maybe I want you to tell me I’m the best, so I can feel worthy because it’s a feeling I’m unfamiliar with. Maybe I don’t understand why that’s important, so you certainly don’t need to worry about it.

Maybe I wanted to kiss you like tomorrow didn’t exist and this was our last chance. Maybe I wanted to feel butterflies in my stomach when our lips touched so I could forget all the bad things that have ever happened. Maybe one good kiss could fix everything and I could be okay again.

Maybe you could leave a scar on me too for me to remember you by. Maybe when the sun rises you’ll think of me and remember my apology. Maybe we could hold hands on the beach and enjoy the daylight. Maybe you could rustle my hair like you wanted to touch me but lacked an excuse. Maybe you could put your arms around me and make me feel safe. Maybe you could make me smile in a way that doesn’t feel like crying.

All these maybes point to goodbye in the end. I’m already getting ready to never see you again. I always prepare for the worst but life has always exceeded expectations. Sometimes it just helps having you there, someone to be silent with. Maybe you don’t have to say a single word, for me to fall in love again.